I woke up at 5 this morning, and since the house was perfectly quiet, I decided to stay up and put in a good amount of prayer time. I’ve desperately needed some quiet time with the Lord. I’ve needed to hear from Him, get some wisdom, and learn how to walk out this path that we’re on. And I heard one thing this morning, which was “wait on Me.” So obviously, my mind went straight over to Isaiah 40:31 NKJV –
But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.
Such a familiar scripture, but such a necessary reminder of what I need right now. I need His strength. I need to walk and not faint; run and not grow weary. That is so where it’s at.
And it’s so hard to take that advice as it’s the day before I leave to drive with my sister to California. Talk about a whirlwind of a week. My kids have been such troopers as I dragged them to both my jobs, the library, and to Target yesterday afternoon. By the time we got to the check out lane at Target, Miss Edie was sleeping straight up in the shopping cart. We pulled into the driveway just as Mark pulled up on his bike ride home from work. And amazingly, since I’ve purposed to not stress and to just work thought each job at a time, the kids and I have done so much better together. Their attitudes changed right along with mine, which is a huge thank the LORD!! Even Edie has been in such a better mood. Whether she’s done with teething right now or just out of a weird phase, I don’t know, but I’m glad to have my sweet girl back. So today is round two as I have to work at home, clean the house, get the laundry finished, hit the bank and grocery store, and then head to work tonight. My sister will be picking me up at 6 tomorrow morning. Yikes.
So waiting on the Lord would be quite timely, and really, I need to do a word study on “wait.” But for now, the message that’s slowly sinking into my heart is that I can go about my to do list and still be focused on Him. When I feel the pressure and stress rise up, I can stop, put worship music on or pull out my Bible, and set my mind on Him. When I lay in bed at night and my mind is jumping from how to approach the immigration issues, to passport fees, to the fact that we’re moving my kids away from my parents, to how will we ever afford all of this, to how to sell the house, and to every other subject on my mind right now, I can stop and say hey, I’m letting my God lead me beside still waters. He is restoring my soul; He is preparing a table for us. He is doing all of this. It’s not up to us. We jut take it one step at a time and one day at a time. To me, right now, that’s waiting. Just waiting for His peace, His wisdom, His presence to lead me day by day, and not getting ahead of Him or into striving or out of His peace.
Even today as I work through my big list of things to be done, I just keep thinking that He goes before us. If we rest in Him, He will prepare the way. He’s going before Haven and me on our 17 hour drive; He goes before me on Sunday on my flight back to Denver. He will be here with Mark to help watch over the kids. He’s going before us to settle immigration issues; He goes before us to sell our house. He will work out the details. What matters most is that I learn from Him and let Him prepare me. What matters most is learning from Him each day, letting Him know that I’m listening, letting Him know that my eyes are on Him.
I’ve had this same song on repeat for weeks, and I think it’s because the lyrics are so spot on. Since they word it better than I ever could, I’ll just leave this here:
In the process
In the waiting
You’re making melodies over me
And your presence
is the promise
For I am a pilgrim on a journey
You will lift my head above the mighty waves
You are able to keep me from stumbling
And my weakness
you are the strength that comes from within
Good shepherd of my soul
Take my hand and lead me on
You make my footsteps and my path secure
So walking on water is just the beginning
Cause my faith to arise, stand at attention
For You are calling me to greater things
how I love You
how I love You
You have not forsaken me
How I love You
how I love You
With you is where I want to be
Amanda Cook Bethel Music – Shepherd Lyrics | MetroLyrics