When you’re an introvert like I am, it’s hard to process things in a way that the people around you understand. For me, processing is a very quiet time, followed by a lot of verbal time (or writing time). I typically either react (not well) to a situation or just shut down until I get the space and quietness to process it. However, when you’re a mom, it’s really hard to get that alone, quiet time. Lately, I’m finding that my quiet time is at night while everyone sleeps. Since Ezra does not sleep at night, he keeps me awake, and I do my processing. Yet it’s not working out that well as I’ve been tired and crabby, and sometimes, you need a Bible and a notepad to process. So I’m feeling a big need to have a day to myself. Not that I don’t love my husband or Ryder, but just a day to get junk out, get the Word in, put some time in for worship, get some for relaxing and feeling like a normal female, and just time to not have to think about anything that has to be done. Does anyone else get that? I feel really selfish for wanting that. Yet I also feel like it’s desperately needed for my sanity, especially before the baby comes.

Anyway, so Ryder and I have been battling it out every morning before work. I think child training is as much about parent training as it’s been hard on both of us, yet we’re hoping it will be worthwhile. By 9am, I’m pretty much exhausted. Forget being alive and chipper by 7pm when Mark gets home. So last night, I went to bed mega-early as I wasn’t feeling well and needed some sleeping time. I then got up early as both guys were already up and was well on my way to work before 9am. (Amazing.) Haven gifted me with the new Hillsong United cd, and so I put it in and just absorbed it. (It will definitely be part of my labor/delivery cd.) Thankfully, Ryder was quiet, so we just listened to this one song, and I’ll just leave this at that as the song says enough.

Take Heart – Aftermath by Hillsong United

There is a light
It burns brighter than the sun
He steals the night
And casts no shadow
There is hope
Should oceans rise and mountains fall
He never fails

So take heart
Let His love lead us through the night
Hold on to hope
And take courage again

In death by love
The fallen world was overcome
He wears the scars of our freedom
In His Name
All our fears are swept away
He never fails

All our troubles
And all our tears
God our hope
He has overcome

All our failure
And all our fear
God our love
He has overcome

All our heartache
And all our pain
God our healer
He has overcome

All our burdens
And all our shame
God our freedom
He has overcome

God our justice
God our grace
God our freedom
He has overcome

God our refuge
God our strength
God is with us
He has overcome

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