I realized something the other day – most of my facebook status updates are negative. There’s not many that are positive, and that bummed me out. That tells me that I’m seeing my glass as half empty, not half full. So I’ve been praying that the Lord would help me to count each blessing every day. And I’ve had some random blessings . . .
The last two months have felt like some of the longest of my life. The last two weeks of my very easy pregnancy turned out to be quite hard and filled with all kinds of health issues. Like my body fell apart and decided that it could not be pregnant anymore. 🙂 That’s actually kind of typical of me, so it’s funny that my body is the same. I put so much prayer into my labor and the delivery of Ryder, and I never fathomed that I’d go through 31 hours of labor only to end up with a c-section. But I have to say that those 31 hours were so very peace filled, sweet, blessed, and just a wonderful time of waiting on our little one to arrive. They were not easy hours; nor were they painless. But the peace of God was all over it. My mid-wife blessed the socks off me throughout the entire process. She massaged my feet, rubbed hands, massaged my legs (which were cramping constantly), taught me how to breathe through each contraction, and as tired as she was, she sat with us and stayed with me even when she could have been sleeping. I got to see her yesterday at my 6 week check-up, and we chatted about my health and my labor/delivery. I was able to express how I’ve felt since being a mom and how it’s been to adjust to everything. She didn’t say one thing that was negative. She just encouraged me, gave me tips, told me that I’m normal, and just let me be me. We ended the appointment with her telling me that she hopes to see us again, she hopes that we’ll come back when it’s time for the next baby – if we’re not living somewhere else in the world. And I was sad to walk out of her office; I hope that we do get to see her again. And I hope that she can deliver our next little one.
My experience over the last few months has taught me this – a.) Prayer is so vital. I don’t feel one ounce of resentment or bitterness that I went through 26 hours of labor only to be told that I had to get an epidural so I could sleep, or 31 hours of labor only to be wheeled into surgery to have a c-section. I don’t feel that all those hours of labor, pain, lots of work were wasted; I got to experience labor!! 🙂 Not that I look forward to it again, but we had such great nurses, great anesthesiologists, and the on call obstetrician just happened to be a Christian. I liked her immediately and trusted her to do the surgery. In the end, we found out that Ryder’s cord was wrapped around his neck twice, which made everyone feel glad that he was actually born via c-section as who knows what might have happened if he had not. So God’s hand was on us the entire time, and He gave us our healthy, happy baby boy.
And b.) Life is change and adjustment. My life has been constant change since 2005, and Mark and I haven’t really known normal life . . . till now. I feel such a deep sense of relief that we no longer have visa paperwork and immigration to deal with, yet I kept waiting for life to go back to normal. It finally dawned on me that this is normal! 🙂 So I’m going to enjoy it . . . even the sleep deprivation.
c.) We’re blessed. We’re blessed that we both have good jobs, I can take Ryder to work with me, we have a house, a very happy puppy, our needs are met, and more than that, we have such great people in our lives. Our families are wonderfuly supportive, and our friends are many. More than anything though, we have a God who simply loves us. Loves us so much that He even chose the right people to be with us as our son was born. We’re blessed.